Friday, January 6, 2012

What's normal?


I had an interesting conversation with Savanah last night.
It was a conversation where I thought to myself. . .
"Where has the time gone? How is she so big now? So grown up?"

We were sitting on the bed, admiring yet another just barely lost tooth.
From out of the blue Savanah says to me -
"Mom I don't want to be deaf."

Trying to not act shocked or sad, her statement stunned me for a moment.
I felt a little paralyzed.
What was I going to say to that?
I didn't have to say anything because she kept talking -

"I don't want an implant anymore. I want ears like you and Daddy have, like Gracie has too. I want to be able to swim and not have to take my implant off. I want to have normal ears. Not deaf ears."

I thought to myself - why does she even know the word normal?
Well duh Mom - everyone knows that word, especially 7-8 years old.
My head was screaming SAY SOMETHING!

So I did. . .

"Savanah you know we love you so much and you are so special and not just because you are deaf. But because there is no one else in this world like you. There is only ONE Savanah. You have beautiful ears and unfortunately we couldn't pick working ears for you - you were born deaf. But we all have learned to make the most out of it. You are the only Savanah in our house that gets to celebrate HAPPY HEARING DAY, you're the only Savanah who gets to sleep without being interrupted with noises, you are the only Savanah who has a puppy named Molly as her personal alarm clock and that alarm clock kisses you in the morning, you are the only Savanah who has their own personal audiologist named Cache and because of this you are the only Savanah who gets to have trips that are just because of you where we get to stay in a hotel and swim and have lots of fun, you are the only Savanah who has an implant and who gets to carry special batteries that only Costco makes. You are the only Savanah in our house that has been able to have special teachers and special schools to help you learn to use your implant and voice! You are OUR Savanah and we wouldn't trade you for anything! You are perfect just the way you are!"

You know what I got as a response.
The biggest hug possible.

I know these conversations will start occuring more frequently.
I know there will be more questions asked.
More dissapointment, more wishing for "normal" ears as she gets older.
But I will take these moments and continue to try to show her how proud we are of her. How blessed we are to have her in our life. How she is so very special to us.
The reason I became a mother was because of Savanah. I will continue to try to show her that not only am I teaching her, she is teaching me everyday!

3 comments:

Nicole said...

I love this! It is the very best response. No one can beat AWESOME INDIVIDUAL Savanah. :)

Chad and Nicole said...

I am bawling right now! I can't imagine how hard that would be as a mom to have to answer a question like that, but your response to her was AMAZING! You are such a great mom! Loved this post. Thank you for sharing!!

Kim said...

I love this...